You Know You're a Hockey Mom When...

Well he might only be 5 but it seems like my son has already been playing hockey forever.  And we are now fully immersed in hockey life as a family.  My daughter still enjoys playing at puck 'n' stick sessions but has decided that the intense schedule hockey requires would prevent her from pursuing other interests and be too much stress with her schoolwork - I'm proud of the maturity that decision shows.  But my son is totally obsessed with hockey in any form - that whole eat, sleep, play hockey saying - its no joke for him.  Even when we aren't at the rink, hockey seems to be present in some form.  I've heard many other hockey parents over the years that my brother has played talk about the unique life of a hockey family.  

So to all those hockey moms and dads (and siblings too) - here's an ode to you...

You Know You're a Hockey Mom When...

• You know how to get your kid's hockey equipment on faster than you can do your own makeup...
• Your winter coat, gloves, hat and blanket ride around in your vehicle even in 90 degree weather...

• And you know exactly where the warmest spot to sit is at each rink...
• Part of your laundry routine involves the systematic spray-down of equipment with something called "Reek Out"...
• You can actually tighten hockey skates without cramping your fingers...

• Your child's birthday involves jersey-shaped cookies or cake...possibly served up at the rink...
• Every coach at the local rink knows you by name...

• But you only know the kids on the team when they have all their equipment on...
• You can cut a mouth guard to the perfect size and shape for your child's mouth in 5 seconds...
• Your basement or garage features some sort of shooting area or cone drill station...

• A large part of your child's wardrobe consists of hockey jerseys or logo gear of their favorite hockey teams...
• You frequently spend winter weekends driving a few hours away in near-blizzard conditions for games and jamborees...
• You know which famous hockey players have which signature celebration moves...and your child may or may not practice them...

• Your child urges you to get to the rink early so they can be the first on ice...
• When your kid doesn't have regularly scheduled hockey you take him to puck & stick to stay "fresh"...which is exactly how he smells when he's done...

• You have attempted to make a hockey goalie out of graham crackers and random candy...
• There are no seasons - just hockey season, spring hockey, summer hockey camp, and fall hockey...
• You know the exact cost of every food at the concessions of your local rink...

• Your ADM hockey player has a set of mini-sticks and a mini net and forces every visitor to your house to play a game...and its serious!

• Air hockey, roller hockey, table hockey with nets made from paper napkin rings and pucks made from straw wrappers...

• You can barely skate but take your kid to open skate anyways and join in despite feeling like an idiot just to see the smile on their face when they hit the ice...

• Including taking part in the team "family night" during which you fell grandly in front of all the coaches and their wives...while your kids skated circles around you...

• You have molds to make hockey-shaped candy and baked goods...

• You altered trip plans to make sure your little hockey player got to see the Stanley Cup in person and get an autograph from a famous player...

• Santa has brought your child hockey equipment...
• Your work wardrobe and weekly food menu revolves around which days your kid has hockey...
• You know how to figure out which locker room and rink your child's game will be on when you get to a new rink...
• You keep a stash of snacks and water bottles in your vehicle to charge your kid back up while you drive them to the rink...

• Your child has a life-size mural of their favorite hockey player in their bedroom...
• You can tell when a pair of skates needs to be sharpened...

• You have a picture of your child with a pacifier on the ice...
• You know how to measure the appropriate length of a hockey stick...and how to tape one up...
• You have to move the hockey stick and gear bag out of the way to load the groceries...

• Family members buy you "hockey mom" gear...and you proudly wear it in public...with one of those picture buttons made from your child's team picture...

• You frequently find your child instructing other non-hockey-playing children on how to properly execute a slapshot...
• When carpooling, someone says they smell a skunk and you have to admit its your child's hockey equipment in the trunk...

• You have a camera full of pictures like this and you actually know where/when each was taken and which child is yours...

I know there are more!  I'd love to hear your hockey parenting stories - 

share them with me through the comments!